I'm SERIOUSLY EXCITED About All My Blessings

I just realized that recently I've been more focused on the things I lack rather than the things I'm blessed with. For example, I've bemoaned the fact that I've been sooooo busy lately, rather than being happy for all the great opportunities with which I've been blessed. I've decided to start rejoicing in my blessings more, and to start off, I'm going to share some of them with you! 

1.) Mi Familia 

2.) The temple being built so close to where I live!

3.) My loving Heavenly Father, Savior, and the Everlasting Gospel

4.) Beautiful fall weather 

5.) Music and my opportunity to learn EVERYTHING about it

6.) Wonderful friends

7.) Holidays coming up OH MY GOODNESS I CANNOT WAIT

8.) Español y mi oportunidad para aprender mucho sobre este idioma (Spansih and my opportunity to learn lots about this language)

9.) My job. I love tutoring. A lot. 

10.) GENERAL CONFERENCE COMING UP!!

Driving Blessings

I am currently learning to drive. While this is something most teenagers enjoy, it terrifies me. Especially when I have certain drivers ed instructors. But we won't go into that. This process of learning to drive has been so scary. Every time I get on the road I'm super nervous and uptight, which doesn't help my driving at all. So naturally I prayed about it. But then, a few weeks ago, I had a really terrible experience driving with my instructor. I left the lesson crying. It was lame. So the night before my next drive, I asked my dad for a priesthood blessing. I really needed comfort and extra assurance. I recieved a beautiful blessing of comfort and peace. I truly felt God's love for me and my testimony of priesthood blessings grew a hundredfold. I was promised that my mind would be clear so that I would be able to learn to drive well, among other things. The next day my drive went wonderfully. I had a different instructor who was very good at teaching me in a way that was gentle and clear to understand. I truly felt the Lord's love for me while I was driving. It was such a blessing.

Then yesterday I had another drive. I had another completely different instructor. To make a long story short, the drive was almost as terrible and nerve wracking  as the one I mentioned first. But I could still feel the hand of the Lord calming me and guiding me. Even though I was still uptight and nervous, I wasn't terrified. And there were several points of time in that hour when I felt Heavenly Father directly speaking words of comfort to my mind. It was incredible. I feel so loved and blessed. 

Sometimes, I feel like God has way more blessings set aside for us than we actually recieve because some of them are dependent upon us asking for them, and sometimes we forget to do that. As I Iearned, Heavenly Father was more than willing and happy to bless me with comfort, the assurance assurance of safety and feeling His love for me, but I had to exercise the faith to ask for a priesthood blessing. I'm so grateful for our gracious, loving Father. I love the blessings He grants me and I love all that He is teaching me. 

We Need God When Life Is Sunny

"We need God just as much on sunny days as we do when it's raining." I'm not sure where I heard this quote, who said it, or if I even wrote it correctly, but I feel like it applies to my life in a big way. Like many, I am so very good at calling upon the Lord when I am in the midst of great trials or turbulent time of tumult. Some of the most sacred times of my life have also been the most difficult ones because they're the ones when I was closest to my God. After all, I needed Him then more than ever.

Or did I?

Actually, I need God with me in my life all the times, equally. There are no times when I need Him more or less, rather times  that need of Heavenly Father is less or more apparent to my imperfect eyes. For instance, when life is all fine and dandy, sometimes my scripture study grows lax and my prayers less intense. However, the moment something goes wrong, I'm quick to my knees. I think this pattern is typical in many people.

So guess what? It is super, super awesome that we pray when we need help!! Woohoo!!! Yeah! That's great! But we can take it to the next level! When life is peachy, have deep, meaningful conversations with Heavenly Father. He loves us so much and wants to hear from us! Talk to Him. Let Him know about how your day went, your triumphs, your mistakes, plans for tomorrow. When we pray like this we become closer to Heavenly Father and Satan has less power over us because we have the Holy Ghost more abundantly in our lives.

Alma 34: 18-27:

 "18 Yea, cry unto him for mercy; for he is mighty to save.

 19 Yea, humble yourselves, and continue in prayer unto him.

 20 Cry unto him when ye are in your fields, yea, over all your flocks.

 21 Cry unto him in your houses, yea, over all your household, both morning, mid-day, and evening.

 22 Yea, cry unto him against the power of your enemies.

 23 Yea, cry unto him against the devil, who is an enemy to all righteousness.

 24 Cry unto him over the crops of your fields, that ye may prosper in them.

 25 Cry over the flocks of your fields, that they may increase.

 26 But this is not all; ye must pour out your souls in your closets, and your secret places, and in your wilderness.

 27 Yea, and when you do not cry unto the Lord, let your hearts be full, drawn out in prayer unto him continually for your welfare, and also for the welfare of those who are around you."

I know that God answers our prayers, hears our prayers, and loves our prayers because He is our loving Father. Even though I'm still working on consistently praying with enough fervor when the going is good, I know that God blesses me most abundantly when I continually call upon Him.

 

Nicaragua

Usually our lives change and we change in small, imperceptible ways every day. Usually. But sometimes we have GIGANTIC, HUGE, INCREDIBLE life-changing experiences that permanently impact the rest of our futures, whether for good or bad. I had an experience like that last week. For good.

I went to Nicaragua.

I WENT TO NICARAGUA!!!! Oh my goodness! It was a dream come true and the coolest thing I've ever done in my life! There are so many things I could say about my thoughts and experiences that I could probably start an entire new blog about it. I think we all know how good I would be at keeping up with that blog though ;) So for now I will share just a little bit.

One of my most favorite things about Nicaragua is how simple life is there. Even though many people are extremely impoverished, they are happy and content with the things they have. They are very grateful and humble when they receive things they need, but they have what they have and are happy with it. I just love that! How many times have I wanted something bigger, something better, something more beautiful? That is a very American mentality. It's not necessarily a wrong mentality, but it was so refreshing to be among people who are so happy with so little. It is an attitude I now am striving to make more present in my life.

Children on the street where we were building a house.

I met a very amazing woman named *Michelle on the trip. She's an American who has been to Nicaragua so many times. She's been there for the past three months, but she is working on traveling the world. She's trilingual and has lived in so many cool places and has done so many amazing things in just a short time (she's only 28), like teaching English to Buddhist Monks. How cool is that? Anyways, I decided early on in my trip that I want to be just like her. She's a great example. I had a wonderful conversation with her about how I can have amazing travel opportunities just like her. In a nutshell, her advice to me was this- Live Simply. Be okay with it and love it. Go with the flow. What amazing advice. I'm not quite sure if I can explain in words what this advice means to me and how I will apply it to my life, but I think it goes along with what I was saying earlier. Just be content with the things you have.

A wonderful girl I got to know. We're being photobombed.

I just love Nicaragua so much. It was everything I expected it to be, and much more. I wish I could go back and live there forever. I showed my family my pictures and told them about my trip for family home evening after I got back. At the end my dad asked me if I could figure out a way to share my testimony in a way that was related to my trip. I knew I could but wasn't sure what I was going to say. But when I opened my mouth to do so, I started crying a lot and couldn't stop. The Spirit was with me so strongly. I'm still trying to figure out exactly what it meant, but I know several things for sure. I know that this opportunity was a marvelous gift from God. I believe it was a tithing blessing, because I would not have been able to go if a relative had not paid my way. I am so grateful for that. I also know that Heavenly Father has implanted a deep,firm love and passion within me for all things latin and latin american. I know it is from Him and that He has given this to me because it will be an important part of my future. I don't know why or how or when, but I am perfectly okay with that because I know everything is in the hands of my loving Father. I'm just grateful for these marvelous gifts He has given and continues to give me.

The wonderful couple for whom we built a house. I love them lots!

If I was old enough to adopt a child... She is SO precious!

I made so many new friends! I played with these kids several days around lunchtime.

Construction!

So... I swam in an extinct volcano... No big deal...

Giant cactus. Need I say more?

I am SO in love with the food there! Especially the rice and beans they eat with every meal! (Not pictured)

After singing at a church service.

Fresh bananas off the tree everyday!

Chinks In Your Armor

We had such a fabulous lesson in seminary this morning which had many, many valuable points and take-aways. One thing that really stood out to me was this idea: Satan wants to find and attack me through the chinks in my armor, so I must put on the full armor of God. Then I must continue to fortify my armor where it is weakest. I have never thought about things quite this way before. Maybe you have. It doesn't seem too different from the normal way of thinking. To me, phrase "chinks in your armor" stuck out like a giraffe in a herd of elephants. I began to ask myself, "Where are the chinks in my armor?"

I suppose it only makes sense to define the phrase. "Chinks in armor" means weak points, or places where it's easier for Satan to tempt you. These might be areas where you're not necessarily doing anything wrong, but you're not doing anything right. For example, perhaps you're kind to people, but you never go out of your way to serve them. That would be a victory for Satan because you would not be acting as an instrument of the Lord to further His work. Or maybe you pray when you need guidance, but you don't consistently say your morning and evening prayers. These are what I consider "chinks in armor".

When I pondered the chinks in my armor, I immediately thought of an area in my life where, if not careful, I could have a chink in my armor. As you probably know, I have decided that I will not have a boyfriend in high school. It is something I have prayed about a lot for a long time and I know this is what God knows is best for me. Lately, however, a guy I really like and I have begun to become really close. We've been texting and talking to each other a lot, innocent flirting, etc. Recently I've been contemplating the possibilities of becoming his girlfriend. However, in the back of my mind I know that I've already made a commitment to myself and my God that I will not date steadily in high school. These thoughts are the beginning of a chink in my armor. If I'm not careful, Satan could squeeze in and injure me through temptation and sin.

This lesson was very timely. The Lord does know what we need, always. He loves to bless us with counsel and guidance so that we can be successful in our sojourn here on Earth. This lesson in seminary helped me strengthen my spiritual "armor" by fortifying a chink. I'm so grateful for seminary and my inspired teacher.

Studying El Libro de Mormon

Something you may or may not know about me is that I have a small obsession with Spanish and Latino things. (Okay, not really. It's a big one!) I love learning the language, I love learning about the culture, the music, the food, ohhhh the food! I even enjoy telenovelas. (Those are kind of like soap operas. It's kind of hard to find appropriate ones... but I've found a few!) Anyway, the point is, I love Spanish. I have a goal to become fluent in the language by the time I graduate high school. So, a week-ish ago I was wondering what other things I could do to help me get better at the language besides the things I am already doing. So I tried to think about how I learned English, and then it hit me! Reading the Book of Mormon!

Therefore, this past Sunday, I pulled up the Spanish BOM on my phone, and I began reading right where I had left off the night before, but this time in Spanish. I would read half of a verse in Spanish, then read the same thing in English. Then I'd finish the verse in Spanish, and finish it in English. Some of the verses I could understand completely without referencing the English text, while others were more difficult. 

Studying my scriptures this way has been delighting me! I noticed a difference in my Spanish comprehension and expanse of vocab literally the next day! Not only has my Spanish been improving, but this has proven to be a very in-depth method of reading my scriptures. Because I spend so much time on each word and phrase, sometimes reading them three or four times, I really have time to ponder the meaning and imagine the goings-on in my head.

My testimony of the power of the Book of Mormon is growing with this new way I'm studying it. Not only do I feel the Spirit when I read it, and recognize it's truth, but I can see how God uses it to bless us in such a variety of ways. It is the truest book on earth. We become closer to God through the Book of Mormon than with any other book on earth. As such, the Lord is blessing me with increased knowledge of Spanish for using the Book of Mormon to study Spanish. It's hard to describe just how it works. It reminds me of how studying the Book of Mormon right before studying for school helps you study more effectively and remember the things you study. Heavenly Father loves to bless us! Especially with knowledge, because knowledge is light, and God loves light.

I just love the Book of Mormon! Y, me encanta El Libro de Mormon.

Life's Good

I love life. I seriously love living. Even though it's hard, mortality is pretty awesome. These are some reasons why my life is so good

1. Music Puns

Today in math class I decided to come up with as many music puns as I could. (We were just checking the homework, don't worry about any losses in educational matter for Whitney.) That seriously made me so happy!

2. The Nutcracker

I'm in the pit orchestra for this (even though I'm not allowed to play, due to injury), and it's amazing! I can't wait for the performance. It's so wonderful to be playing something I've loved my whole life.

3. Spanish

I seriously love Spanish. I love love love hearing it and feeling the words dance around on my tongue. I also enjoy using it in conversation with other Spanish speakers. I've been working quite hard on my Spanish and it's coming along quite nicely. There is so much satisfaction in that.

4. Being a Daughter of God

 

I love going to my Heavenly Father in prayer. I love knowing that He loves me infinitely and is in charge of my life. I love that He is always with me (D&C 84:88). I love that I am so special and important to Him. I love that He guides me through and helps me conquer all of my trials.

5. Autumn

 

I simply adore the fall. It smells and feels and looks so good! It makes me so very, very happy! I love everything that happens in fall. I love the holidays, the promise of Christmas around the corner, the pumpkin bread, sweaters, and having the windows open. Aaaaaaand, I LOVE General Conference!

What has the Lord blessed you with? What are you grateful for? This week, really treasure those things which you love. Think about your blessings more than your problems. You'll be amazed at what happens!

Tender Blessings Because He Loves Us

Lately I have been struck by how the Lord brings to pass His work with timing and ways we don't understand, and by small and simple means. Of course one hears this all the time, but it's hard to really understand until one has experienced it.

For several years I have been dealing with injuries caused by my viola-playing. It's been off and on. I won't go into all the details, but suffice it to say that there has been not only a lot of pain, but a lot of heartache, confusion, fear, and frustration. Heartache from not being allowed to do what I love. Confusion and fear of not knowing how long-term injuries will affect my future viola career. And, frustration of not being able to participate in the orchestras, ensembles, pit orchestras, etc. Of course I have learned so incredibly much from this. More than I could even write in a book, probably. I've definitely grown a hundred-fold times closer to my wonderful Father in Heaven. Within the past few days, though, I have seen how merciful Heavenly Father is after the trial of our faith and how he answers prayers in different ways than we expect- and the outcome is always better for us, whether we realize it, or not.

This week has been a time of realizing it. Here's the story (in a nutshell, as I have been practicing how to keep things more concise and not ramble).

I have been to several doctors over the past few years. Some have been more helpful than others, but I haven't yet found a doctor with enough background in treating musicians to know how to diagnose and treat me. So after searching for doctors in vain, I did what all people do when looking for a doctor- emailed the symphony orchestra of my city. Professionals. Reeeeally awesome, famous professionals. After a week of not seeing a response, however, I began to lose hope. Maybe they were too busy. Maybe they never got my email. Maybe they don't care. But yesterday I got this email:

Dear Whitney,

I am very sorry to hear of your playing injury.  As a fellow musician, I know how frustrating and difficult to diagnose these types of problems can be.  

I will send your request onto the rest of the musicians to see if we can put you in touch with someone who may be able to help you.  The orchestra is currently on hiatus, but returns to work next week.  Once everyone is back I will do my best to gather any referrals I can and forward them to you.  Music is an important part of our lives, and it sounds like it is a big part of yours, so let's get you back onstage!

Thanks for you message and someone will be in touch soon.

Best,

My Name is Confidential Because This is Being Posted on the Internet

After I read this emails just came streaming in from musicians in the symphony. They were all very concerned for me. They gave me all the suggestions each of them could. They were all very genuinely concerned for me and wished me the best. One musician is even going to meet with me and personally help me. And I'm still getting more emails. I'm acquiring a wealth of knowledge of good doctors to go to, and other things to help me.

But it gets better! The musician who originally emailed me offered me a tour of the concert hall and to introduce me to the musicians and let me talk with them backstage after some of their concerts! How amazing is that? I feel so blessed! 

This was a way Heavenly Father showed His love for me. He answered my prayers through the small service of many people. And, I'm being blessed beyond what I could have imagined! How great is the goodness of our God. He loves His children. 

This is me and my viola, Sebastian. Yes. I named him. :)

 

Learn to Love it

Life is hard. Very hard. Good thing we have a loving Heavenly Father always watching over us! I've felt Him especially watching over me lately.

I had a really rough time last night. You know, the ones where you cry really hard, use up way too much kleenex, and end up with a headache. Not fun. I was upset about typical teenage problems. Friends, how my peers view me, school, etc.  (The joys of being a teen, right?) I prayed about it and talked to my parents about it. Then I got a blessing of comfort from my dad. But in the back of my mind the whole time I had the feeling that I needed to read the Book of Mormon. I hadn't had my daily scripture study yet. Usually I read the scriptures on my ipod (since my scriptures are at seminary), but I don't really like to read them from my ipod because they're difficult to mark that way. I decided I really wanted to dive into the scriptures. So after my blessing, I ran and grabbed a new Book of Mormon off the shelf and a dozen colored pens and highlighters. I read three chapters, and just went to town highlighting and underlining meaningful phrases and verses, and writing in the margins. I decided that this would be my copy of the Book of Mormon for seriously marking up. The chapters I read yesterday were the most meaningful I've read in a long time. Not only did I get more out of them because I was actively studying, but Heavenly Father knew exactly what I needed to read to help me feel better and led me to those chapters.
After reading those amazing chapters, and truly feeling Heavenly Father speak to me through the scriptures, I felt so much better. Love, peace, and a feeling of home surrounded me. God answered my prayers through the scriptures. The concerns and questions I had were answered in the verses I read. How wonderful it is when that happens.
And it can happen everyday when we make our scripture study active. I'm guilty of passive scripture study sometimes. Life is busy, but we can't let that get in the way of our conduit of power, for that's what the scriptures are.
Instead of viewing scripture study as long, or boring, we can learn to love it. Learn to love the Book of Mormon. Learn to love it. Begin to look forward to your scripture study. Read with clear questions to be answered in mind. Learn to love it. The scriptures, and the Book of Mormon, will bring so many blessings into our lives. The more we invest in them, the more we'll get out of them. They are our truest source of power.

Strength from my Patriachal Blessing

Recently I have been struggling with some health difficulties and other struggles. In the past when trials of this propensity arrived at my door they engulfed me. I was totally taken over in despair and helplessness. I did learn and grow from them, and I used them to grow closer to my Heavenly Father, but it was a long, straining journey. This time, I have a new weapon in my belt- my patriarchal blessing. I cannot describe in words the immense comfort I have received and continue to receive from that beautiful blessing. It has given me the strength and knowledge to help me be patient through my time of affliction. Instead of being debilitated by fear and anxiety, I am able to be calm and happy, because I know that when I keep the commandments attached to the blessings I'm looking forward to in my blessing, all will be well.
It is amazing to me that the answers to the two big tribulations in my life right now are in my blessing, along with the blessings that can be mine when I do the things I'm asked to do. It's just so beautiful how it all works. Heavenly Father is so marvelous! He is perfect, and His plan is, too. Everything is really so spectacular, if you think about it!

A Note on Progress

As I was laying in bed last night I was pondering the mysteries of the universe. Okay, not really, but I was thinking deeply about my current life. Lately, I've felt stagnant. I'm not digressing or doing anything wrong, but I haven't truly been progressing. And that's why we're in this mortal state- to progress! As I was mulling over the cause of my lack of movement I had an epiphany. Here's what went on in my head:

Whitney's Mind: "Why do I feel like I'm not progressing? It's so frustrating! I hate it when this happens. What can I do to start accomplishing things? I know! Maybe tomorrow I can do this certain thing. That will help me in this goal in my life. Oh, but wait. Man, I don't like doing that. It's out of my comfort zone. Hold on!!! Wait a minute! Duh! That's the key to growth! You have to step out of your comfort zone! Woah! That makes so much sense! Oh, and didn't I hear a talk about that a while ago? Yes, yes I did. Wow! I think I just discovered the key to success!"

And there was much rejoicing. In fact, my brain might have even danced a jig or something. It's completely possible.

Also, I did hear a talk about progression that mentioned leaving our comfort zones. Here are some profound things I learned form it:

• When we reach plateaus, that's when Heavenly Father sees if we really want to grow.
• As we take the sacrament each week, Father asks us, "My child, what did you do this week to grow?" He doesn't expect perfection, just growth.
• If we are going to stay above the growing evil, we have to keep growing!

So, today I applied my principle that stepping out of our comfort zones brings growth. I was practicing viola. I just got the music for an opera last night and I started practicing it today. Let me tell you- it is the hardest music I've ever played!!! I really didn't want to start practicing that music this morning. It seemed so scary!  But, I remembered that I needed to step out of my comfort zone if I wanted to grow musically. So, I practiced it. And yes, it was uncomfortable. I didn't really love it. But, I know for sure that I am that much closer to mastering the music, and that my skill in general increased ever-so-slightly because I exercised faith in that principle. I finished practicing with satisfaction and the beautiful feeling of being proud of myself.

It makes me wonder- what could each of us do if we stepped outside of our comfort zones? How would you grow? What could our world accomplish?

Coming Full Circle

Life is going really well for me right now. It is especially so in contrast to this time last year (See here, here, and especially here). Not everything about my life is perfect, but my life is so amazing! I've been able to see how the Lord comes full circle and delivers the blessings promised for obedience and as a result of several long-lasting hardships I've endured. Nothing is as rewarding as this.

Over the past three or four years, I've been working on a personal goal which I never achieved. This January I rededicated myself to this goal (again) and I'm finally making progress! It's a visible sort of progress that I can see all the time, and it's so incredibly rewarding to know that I'm beginning to conquer something I've been struggling with for so long!

As you can read in the links above, I've had a loooot of back problems over the past year and a half. I was in pain, I could hardly move, I couldn't play my viola, and didn't know if I ever would again (which, if you don't know, viola is my LIFE! I plan to major in it, etc.), I wore a back brace which looked terrible and was extremely uncomfortable... you get the picture. It was hard.But, a year and a half later, I have been extremely blessed! I now am in the highest orchestra in my school, and I'm first chair. Because my back is strong enough I am able to practice a lot, which helps me excel.  I also started a string quartet with some of my friends, and we now play for weddings, parties, and such. And, this year I am a member of the Honor Orchestra of America, which, if you're not a musician, is a big deal. I'm sooooo incredibly excited, and SO grateful to my Heavenly Father who has blessed me to make these things possible.

Most of my life I've battled severe chronic depression. This was especially hard to bear last winter in addition to the other trials I had. It became much worse. But slowly, I have learned how to combat the negative feelings which seem to constantly threaten to make camp in my brain. Through the Lord's help, I am able to feel peaceful, joyful, and optimistic nearly all the time. This is such a relief and beautiful blessing for which I am extremely grateful.

I feel so blessed right now. It's so wonderful to be in a season of my life filled with blessings. There are even more blessings I'm experiencing, but I can't list them all. I love my Heavenly Father, and I know He loves me.

Talents to Bless Others

I remember that a while ago I prayed and asked my Father in Heaven to allow me to be an instrument in His hands. I wanted with my whole being to help others and bring about the Lord's purposes. Immediately, I started noticing every-day opportunities to help others. These may or may not have been there before I asked, but the Lord helped me find and notice them.

I reflect on this as I wonder at how Heavenly Father utilizes the talents He has put in me to bless His children. The Lord places beautiful spiritual gifts and marvelous talents in each of us, and I feel the greatest sense of peace and achievement when I use those talents to serve my fellow men.

Some talents I've been blessed with are empathy and compassion. I've striven to further develop these qualities, and I'm amazed to see how it's blessed me.

I have a lot of close friends. They're not necessarily all "popular" or whatever, but I have a lot of friends. At an increasing rate, my friends have been coming to me when they are in emotional pain and need help. They visit me for comfort and rest from their oppression. It makes me feel so special that the Lord trusts me with a job so precious as this. He put me through specific trials in my past that help me understand where my friends are coming from and how to help them feel better.

I know that our Heavenly Father has blessed us all with very specific talents and abilities to progress His work on the earth. Even if you haven't found them yet, God created YOU to possess wonderful traits and qualities of Him. We are, after all, the spirit offspring of Heavenly Father. He gave us these gifts because He loves us.

And, of course, as superman, or spider man, or some other man said, "With great power comes great responsibility". We feel the most peace and the greatest sense of accomplishment when we use our talents to bless others. And in turn, they increase when we use them to be an instrument in Heavenly Father's hands.

So, here's the challenge I pose to you. Find your spiritual gifts and talents! Once you've found them, learn to use them! And watch as the Lord blesses you in return.

We feel the greatest sense of accomplishment when we use our talents to bless others.

 

Father Loves to Bless Us

Hey everyone! I hope you are all doing completely awesomely, which, I'm sure you are!

So, I have seating auditions on Wednesday. Two days from now. And, accordingly, I've been practicing my butt off. But, I've been super nervous because I haven't felt ready. And my time for practice is slowly dwindling. As of earlier today, I did not AT ALL feel prepared. But now I do. The acquisition of that prepared feeling has a story. Because I like stories.

It starts this morning. In the morning, I planned to spend all evening practicing tonight.  And that concludes the morning portion of the story. So I went about my day. Right before orchestra, last period, I found my best friend Kallie*, and we began to walk to class. But she seemed really sad. She wouldn't talk, and I couldn't get her to tell me what was wrong. I'd never seen her like that before. It was really scary for me because I didn't know how to react. All I knew was that my bestest friend ever was obviously going through deep emotional pain. It tore my heart. And I felt awful that I couldn't help because she wouldn't tell me what was going on. So, I never ended up finding out. We had orchestra, then we went home. I told her over and over that I loved her, and I texted her, and wrote on her facebook wall. I prayed that Heavenly Father would comfort her. But I was depressed. I was scared because I didn't know if, like, she got a text from her mom that her sister was in the hospital, or if her grandma died, or… I don't even know.  But I was worried sick. And depressed.

So, I got home, and I tried to practice. I hacked away at my auditions cuts and solo piece for about an hour, but it was fruitful in only the sour fruits of frustration, self-anger, more depression, worry, and back pain. I felt miserable. Nothing was working. I was so scared for auditions and about Kallie.

After dinner, I texted Kallie again, and this time she told me that she felt all better. I was OVERJOYED! Relief flooded me. I felt awesome. It astonished me just how much worry left me when I knew she was okay.

So then, I practiced again. This time I prayed that Heavenly Father would help me with my practice. I was a little skeptical because I didn't know if He would help since I ask for things so much, but I decided that if I went ahead and prayed for that blessing, and had faith that He could and would, that He would. And my Father did.

Right after my prayer, I thought, "Hey, I need to rosin my bow." So I did. Then, I knew I needed slow metronome practice. So I set it up. Then, I knew just how slowly to start practicing. My practicing was beautifully smooth and practically perfect.  I increased in ability a lot-fold. I don't know how much. Just a lot. I now feel a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot more confident for the chair test. AND I still have another day for practice. I've got this!

I'm so grateful for my Father in Heaven who loves me sooooo much. Today I learned that He loves blessing us, and doesn't get annoyed when we ask Him for things. He wants to bless me. And I love Him.

*Name has been changed

Prayer is so powerful. It's our access to fortification from heaven.

Blessings from Promptings Part Two

Another new post! Look at me, I'm on a roll! So, I know none of you have probably been able to sleep at all because you've been anticipating my part II post. Right? Well, even if you weren't, here it is.

Because I followed the promptings to invite James to sit at our table on Monday, a similar decision wasn't too difficult to make later in the week.

As I was sitting in study hall for the first time, I looked around to see who I knew. One person. Her name was *Marie, and we only sort of knew each other. She sat behind me. I turned around and searched the room for anyone else I knew, but I couldn't find anyone. Except a girl named *Kathleen. She was very quiet, and not many people talked to her. But I didn't take much note. I went about the study hall working on homework. At the end of the period, I talked with Marie to wait until the bell. I remembered Kathleen, sitting right next to us. I knew she was watching us talk. She was bored and had no one with whom to converse. But I didn't want to talk to her. If I were to be brutally honest with myself, I'd have to admit that I probably didn't want to talk to her because I didn't want people to associate me with her. In hindsight, I see that was a completely awful attitude to have. But, I knew that I should talk to her, even if I didn't want to. So I struck up a casual conversation that probably sounded something like this:

Me: "Hey, your name is Kathleen, right?:
Kathleen: "Yeah, you're Whitney."
Me: "Yeah. Um, I think we were in the same Spanish class last year."
Kathleen: "Yep. We were."
Me: "So... um... how's the semester going?"

You get the point.
It was kind of awkward.
At least for me.

I walked out of that class feeling proud of myself that I followed the prompting to talk to her even though I didn't want to. I knew Heavenly Father was proud too.

Okay, now fast forward a few weeks. In that time, I talked to Kathleen more in study hall and I got to know her a bit better. I learned that we have some common interests. Oh, and in those weeks I was nominated "Student of the Month". And yeah, that does affect my story.

So, on a certain day last week, all the kids who were chosen as "Student of the Month" were supposed to meet in the office so that we could all go out to lunch with some of the administrators. Guess who Whitney saw when she got there? If you guessed Kathleen, you're good at guessing. If not, then I'm seriously doubting your logic and reasoning skills. :D So, I went over to her to congratulate her and we ended up sitting by each other for lunch. I learned even more about her. By this time I had decided that she was a pretty cool person. We had a lot of fun during that lunch, met some new people, and the food was delicious. Near the end of the meal, the girls at our table were discussing our different religions. When it was my turn I briefly shared about being LDS. Then, Kathleen turned to me and said, "My parents told me that if they ever got the chance to become Mormon that they would. I always tell them that our whole family should become Mormon." Woah! Woah! That deserves a third woah. Woah! I couldn't believe my ears. I was SO EXCITED. I don't think you can fathom how excited I was to hear that. SO EXCITED! And even though I was dancing on the inside, I kept my composure and warmly told her that I could give her some information and talk to her more about it if she wanted. She agreed, and the next day I brought her some stuff. (You know, pass along cards and other good stuff).

Wow! Do you see how the Lord blesses us when we follow His promptings? I've seen that. People who are ready to hear the gospel have been placed in my path, and I wouldn't have even known it had I not heeded the promptings that the Holy Ghost gave me. I feel so incredibly blessed to have this opportunity!!! I know that the Lord blesses us when we heed the promptings we are given. When we do so, we are given more inspiration and responsibility. It's so cool.

Thus ends my two-part post about the promptings of the Holy Ghost. Keep checking back, though. I have a ton of posts in mind.

The Blessings of Trials

Lately, I've been feeling the most wonderful joy inside of me, for no apparent reason at all. Well, sort of. There hasn't been any big, extraordinary event in my life lately, and I still have struggles, but my life is just so happy.
I feel so overjoyed to be alive. I know that I have a special and divine purpose here on earth. I can feel that. I am starting to see my part in life and it's so exciting.
As you may know, this past winter, spring, and summer were really tough for me. They were the hardest months I've ever known. I went through many long, drawn out trials. I prayed over and over again for solace, healing, and peace. They were months filled with pain and desperation. Now, however, I'm seeing those trials come to a close and I am experiencing a very blessed reprieve. I feel so grateful to my Heavenly Father that He gave me the strength to come out on top. I am so blessed.
Looking in retrospect, I can see just how much those painfully, seemingly excruciating trials helped me grow. I can see how much my relationship with my Savior, Father in Heaven, and the Holy Ghost have grown. I have learned to pray with all of my might to my Heavenly Father. He listens, and loves me. I've realized how magnificent and marvelous Christ's atonement is for me. And, I've come to recognize the Holy Ghost's influence more precisely in my life. These are incredible gifts that help me every day.
For example, the past seven months I have worn a back brace. When I first got it, I was devastated. It looked so awful on me, and I felt so self conscious. Sometimes I didn't even want to leave the house. Plus, it was uncomfortable. I tried and I tried to accept it. I prayed continually that Father would grant me the power to see myself as He did, instead of just seeing how I looked. It took a long time, about six months, but finally I started being able to see myself as a beautiful daughter of God. This is one of the main things I learned from wearing my brace. I realized that it truly is not what's on the outside that counts. My identity is not what color my hair is, or how shirts may look on me, that is just an earthly shell. My identity is a noble, royal, elect daughter of God, saved through the ages for such a time as this. Finally, a few weeks ago, my doctor gave me permission to stop wearing the brace. I feel so incredibly liberated and exhilarated. I didn't realize how much of a blessing it is to be able to bend over, twist my torso, and stretch my back until I had a large, ugly, green piece of plastic wrapped around my body everyday.

This is kind of what my brace looked like, except it was forest green (it had a water droplet pattern), and the straps were a little different. But, the top went to a bit under my neck, the bottom went over my hips.

Also, ever since last fall, one of my dear friends has been suffering a devastating trial. It practically destroyed this wonderful person. It was so difficult to see my friend in so much anguish, and know that they wouldn't accept the Lord's help. I've been praying for this person everyday for a year, and fasting for them every single fast Sunday. Sometimes I even fasted for my friend on non-fast Sundays. But, about a week or to ago, I put this person's name on the temple prayer roll. I'd never done that for anyone before, but I knew it couldn't hurt. Almost immediately, I saw a change in this person. My friend's habits have begun to change for the better. I've seen this person begin to draw closer to the Lord. And my relationship with this friend has increased ever so much just in this short period of time. I'm so extremely grateful that the Lord is answering my prayer and helping my amazing friend. I have developed a testimony of the temple prayer roll. I'm so incredibly thankful for it. And I'm so very glad that my friend is beginning to be healed by the Savior's atonement.
This, my dear friends, is why I am so full of joy. I am just so wonderfully glad that I have such a loving and merciful God. My testimony has truly been strengthened through my trials, and there have been many. I'm so eternally grateful that I am the daughter of my Father in Heaven. I know for sure that there are great things in store for me. I know that He has a plan and purpose for me here on this earth.
If you are struggling, upset, angry, afflicted, depressed, grieving, or are in any other way facing trials, turn to the Lord. He holds the balm for your pain. I know this to be true with every fiber of my being. The Lord loves you. I know this. You are a precious child of a King.

Christ's arms are always open. He will carry you.

Stories from School

Hey! Well, I started school again on Wednesday. And, it was nowhere near as scary as I thought it would be! It was actually fun! I met lots of new people, and I didn't even get lost once, which for me is pretty amazing! I know that the Lord blessed me so that things went smoothly for me. Starting this school also allowed me to have some pretty amazing experiences, and I want to share some of them with you.

The first day went pretty well. But, by the time lunch rolled around, I couldn't find anyone I knew to sit with. So, I started to worry. But then I found a girl I sort of knew, and she let me sit with her. After that, some of her friends, whom I didn't know, sat at the table as well. we were introduced, and they seemed nice enough. But soon they started swearing and talking about things I didn't want to hear. I just looked away and never laughed or responded when they talked of those things. After a while of that, my acquaintance looked over at me when they were talking and said, "This makes you uncomfortable, doesn't it." I was surprised, so I responded saying, "Well, yeah it does." She said, "I could kind of tell." Then I asked, "How did you know that I don't speak like that? We haven't really known each other that long." She said, "I don't know. You just don't seem like that kind of person." This really touched me. It made me realize that other people truly do see my example, even if they don't say so all the time. 

At the end of the second day of school, I got on the bus to go home. However, all of the seats that I would have wanted were full. So, I sat in the only empty seat, which was near the back of the bus, and the seats which surrounded it were filled with who were a lot bigger and older than me, and who I knew were really mean. Needless to say, I was kinda scared of them. I was afraid that they would try to do something to me, and all of the awful things that they were capable of doing rushed through my mind. I thought for sure that the bus ride home would be miserable. So then, I decided to say a prayer to comfort and protect me. Before I could even finish saying my prayer, this scripture came to my mind:

"And whoso receiveth you, there I will be also, for I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up."

- Doctrine and Covenants 84:88

I realized that God would send His angels to protect me should I need protecting. In fact, I thought, there could have been an angel sitting next to me on that bus, and I didn't know. After Heavenly Father told me that through the Holy Ghost, I felt calm. I was able to listen to my ipod for the rest of the bus ride in peace. Those boys ended up ignoring me the whole ride home, which is just how I wanted it. I am so grateful that Heavenly Father protects us and that He answers our prayers.

These have been some powerful lessons for me. They seemed like small occurrences at the time, but after looking back, I realized that Heavenly Father blesses me in many small, almost imperceptible ways every day! It's incredible! Now I've been able to find those small blessings everywhere, which in itself is a blessing! I'm so grateful for my loving Father in Heaven. And I'm so grateful for my Savior, Jesus Christ who makes every day worth living. 

 

The Influence of the Holy Ghost

Usually I have a general topic in mind and some sort of plan for what I'll convey, if vague. But today, I'm wingin' it. I know that the Spirit will guide my words.


The Spirit. Yes. That is what I'll talk about.

The Holy Ghost has several names: The Spirit, Holy Spirit, Holy Ghost, Comforter, just to name a few.

Who is the Holy Ghost?
The Holy Ghost is the third member of the Godhead. He is a personage of spirit, without a body of flesh and bones. He is often referred to as the Spirit, the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of God, the Spirit of the Lord, or the Comforter.   -Holy Ghost, Study By Topic

What does He do?
The Spirit has many roles. He comforts us when we are weary. He answers our prayers. He testifies of truth when it is taught. It is through his witness that we can obtain a testimony of God the Father and Jesus Christ. He also can guide us. When we are about to make a decision, the Spirit can help us to feel which way is right. This can be a matter of choosing whether you will obey your parents, which class you should take with your two leftover credits, which college to go to, or any decision. The Holy Ghost can also protect us. He does this by warning us when we are about to make a wrong choice or if we are in danger.

How do I know if I am feeling/ have felt the Holy Ghost?
This is difficult to answer. Everybody feels the Spirit a bit differently. Most people describe hearing a "still small voice" or feeling a warmth. Some people cry when they are feeling the Spirit very strongly; they cry in a good, happy way. Sometimes you will feel at peace. Sometimes you will feel elated and jubilant. Other times you will just feel still and calm.
Often, it takes a lot of practice to figure out when your feeling the Spirit verses over-analyzing your own thoughts. Sometimes it's very obvious, sometimes it's not. You can strengthen your ability to realize the promptings and feelings of the Holy Ghost by praying for help and putting yourself in situations that are conducive to the Spirit.  Ponder the scriptures after you read them. Sit in a few moments of silence after praying so you can feel God answering your prayers through the  Spirit.

How can I feel the Spirit more in my life?
Start off by reading your scriptures, particularly the Book of Mormon, daily. Pray daily with real intent and a sincere heart. Do not place yourself in places or situations where wickedness and crudeness abound. Participate in wholesome activities. Keep the commandments. Take the sacrament and keep your covenants.

I know that the Holy Ghost is real. He most definitely is! I have felt his wonderful, powerful influence in my life. Many nights I have almost cried myself to sleep, but then I have been filled with stillness, peace, and joy by the Holy Ghost. He loves us, just like Heavenly Father loves us and Jesus loves us.

You Can Be Better

I've been going through a lot of hard times lately. I've had health issues, lots of health issues, and everything that accompanies them. Through these trials, I've been struggling to identify why I was in the pain I was in, and why I felt the way I did, physically and emotionally.  I knew trials and hardships are in life to "polish us", but I felt like I was a bad person because I had trials. As if, I wasn't good enough because I had to be polished.

Then in General Conference, as I was pondering these things, the words came into my mind:

"You are always good enough for me, but these trials are an opportunity I'm giving you to become better."

Then, I began see the trials I'm facing as a gift, a privilege, and an honor. These trials are hard, but that means that Heavenly Father trusts me with difficult tasks. He loves me enough to give me opportunities to grow. 

These next months of my life are not going to be easy. Before, I would have faced the future with fear. But now, I can take bold leaps into the face of tomorrow because I know that Heavenly Father loves me and that He knows I can accomplish these tasks He has placed before me. By viewing my trials as privileges instead of pain, I can have courage to beat them and learn something from them. I will not let Satan get the best of me by using self-pity and self-doubt. I can be, and will be stronger than these trials that shroud my current life.

"And it came to pass that I, Nephi, said unto my father: I ^awill go and do the things which the Lord hath commanded, for I know that the Lord giveth no ^bcommandments unto the children of men, save he shall ^cprepare a way for them that they may accomplish the thing which he commandeth them."

-1 Nephi 3:17