Small and Simple Example- Great Impact

Lately I've been just a little discouraged because I have felt like I'm not being the example I can be. Especially these past two weeks. I haven't been doing anything wrong to be a bad example, and I've been doing lots of good things, but I just felt a little un-brilliant and uninspiring. I had to keep telling myself, though, that all the little things we do add up. The little choices which make up who we are are noticed by those around us. I reminded myself of the scripture, "...behold I say unto you, that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass..." (Alma 37:6)

Then, I decided to try to notice the little things I did everyday to help others, be righteous, and set a good example in general. Some of these things included:

• Being patient and loving to those who might annoy me
• Setting and working toward personal goals
• Being optimistic about trials and helping others be optimistic about theirs
• Paying attention and loving to learn in church meetings
• Giving advice to those who come to me with problems
• Being polite and kind to everyone
• Dressing modestly, using good language, keeping the dating standards, keeping the sabbath day holy

These are all small things which I don't ever think twice about over the course of my day, but I realized that their combined effect is really powerful. I bet you all do these things, too! People do notice that we are different, and they think it's awesome! They are drawn to our lights! We just don't always realize it because we can't read minds.

However, there are those awesome occasions when those affected by our awesome examples tell us about it. It's so cool when that happens! That happened to me on Sunday.

An eleven year old girl in our ward came up to me after church and told me that she had noticed me taking notes in Sacrament meeting for several weeks. She decided that she wanted to take notes, too. I was told that her mom bought her a special notebook for it, and that she was going to hang up her notes on her locker. I was so touched and humbled by her acknowledgement of how my actions affected her. Taking notes is a simple thing I do for myself, but because I wanted to bless my own life, it blessed her's too!

So really, we're not the only ones affected by keeping the commandments and our awesome acts of righteousness. Those around us are watching, and the things we do have a ripple effect. Don't be discouraged if no one comes up to you and tells you that you're inspiring them! Just because no one tells you doesn't mean it's not happening! So what will you do with your good example? Who will your ripple touch? You may never know in this life, but just think about all the people you could be inspiring! It's exciting, isn't it?
 

Don't Pass It On

One of the downsides high school is that it's full of drama. Ewwww. Drama. Everyone has to deal with at least a little bit of it in high school, whether it's their fault, or not. Some are good at evading it, but others seem to gravitate towards it. What's the deal?

Even though the school year is young, there is already a lot of drama happening in my circles- things which don't directly have to deal with me, yet affect me. Much more than I ever noticed last year, or the year before. But the thing which bothers me the most, and what really makes high school drama dramatic, is the gossip which accompanies it. Even some of my church friends gossip. It's really not cool. Even if the things you say about someone are true, if it's someone's personal matters, or unkind, it's still gossip.

The For Strength of Youth says, "Speak kindly and positively about others. Choose not to insult others or put them down, even in joking. Avoid gossip of any kind, and avoid speaking in anger. When you are tempted to say harsh or hurtful things, leave them unsaid." 

Talking badly about others does not make you cooler. It just creates enemies for yourself in the end. Jesus commanded us to love all men. How is that possible if one isn't on speaking terms with another because of something which had been said?

I can truthfully say that there is no one in this world that I dislike. I hate no one. It is a wonderful blessing. This is because I make it a priority to only say kind things to and about others. I promise it's possible. :)

This is what inspired me to make a personal commitment to avoid gossip. What do you think of it?

The Deal With Dating After Sixteen

I have news! I have finally come to a wonderful decision! For a while now I've been slightly wavering on a topic we all know lots about: dating. It is common knowledge that we shouldn't date until we're sixteen, and that once we're sixteen we should only go on group dates. But after that, the standards are a bit ambiguous. Many youth date steadily, and it's perfectly accepted by society. But there are always the few in church who advise us not to have serious relationships in high school at all. And that is where I wavered.
That point in time is still in my future, and I've been thinking about it a lot for a long time. But several things have happened in the past week to help me make up my mind.
I went to EFY. We had a class about preparing for our missions, and in it the teacher told us just how difficult it is to prepare for a mission if one has broken the law of chastity, or even very physically intimate without going all the way. I knew at that moment that I didn't even want to put myself in a situation where it would be remotely easy for such an occurrence to happen.
A return missionary spoke in our ward yesterday and talked about how the purpose of dating and being in relationships is to prepare for marriage. That's the only reason! So what's the point in high school? I'm not getting married in high school, nor do I want to get married immediately out of high school! I'm still a kid!
And, the occurrence which helped me make up my mind the most: I had a long phone conversation with my friend last night. He's not a member. But he was having some girl problems and called for advice and comfort. In our conversation, I ended up sort of bearing my testimony to him of our dating standards. I told him that the problems he was facing was one of the reasons why my church advises us not to date until age sixteen. I also told him about the purpose of serious relationships. I am very emotional, and feel things very deeply, including romantic feelings. He knows this. I told him that being in a relationship would easily put in me in situations where I would be overwhelmed with feelings, and they'd distract me from all else. I'd justify skipping my practicing viola for hanging out with my boyfriend, which will NOT propel me in the direction I want for my future and career. After telling him all of this he said, "If you can make it through high school without dating someone, I will respect you more than I respect any person in this whole world. I already respect you a lot, but this will put you through the roof. I wish I never dated these past years of high school, and I think I'm going to try that this year." Him saying that to me helped me realize how much of an influence I can be when I testify of my standards.
So after these three things happened, I made a decision. I will not date steadily in high school. It's just not worth it. I won't be as close to my Heavenly Father, and doing so will get in the way of everything. It's the principle of Good, Better, Best. Waiting til age sixteen to date is good. Going on group dates for a while before being in a relationship in high school is better. But waiting to have serious relationships until after high school is best. I want the best. I know it will bless me. I know that my life will be that much better because of this choice I am making. I know I will have more success in my pursuits. Dating in college as a young adult will be so much better.  And future generations will be blessed because of my righteous example.

"It's the principle of Good, Better, Best."

The Power of a Righteous Friend

Friends are awesome. I am blessed to have the best friends in the whole entire universe. (Though I'm sure all of you are pretty fantastic, yourselves.) My friends stick up for me, help me when I'm down, make me feel loved, and I always have a great time with them.
A few weeks ago I had an experience which really helped me realize the value of true, righteous friends. I was getting ready to go to a long rehearsal where there would be tons of people, it'd be really hot, and we were going to do a lot of standing around, waiting. I'd never truly been tempted to dress immodestly before, but all of a sudden I really wanted to wear a pair of immodest shorts. They were comfy, cool, and would just be so easy to wear. I began rationalizing all the reasons why I should wear them, but deep down I knew it was wrong.  Then, at thought came to me. Trevor* is going to be there tonight. I don't want to dress that way in front of Trevor. He would be so disappointed, and uncomfortable. Trevor, is one of my best friends in the world and one of the coolest young men I know. He is the standard of righteous living. Always going above what is asked of him, Trevor is one of everyone's favorite people- member and nonmember alike. With that in mind, I put on some modest shorts and went my way.
It was so amazing to me that Trevor was so righteous that he could influence me for good without even being with me at that moment. I am truly blessed to have him in my life. He is an amazing friend.
So my question is: Do you have friends like Trevor? Do your friends influence you for good? Of course not everyone you surround yourself with will be like him. You will have acquaintances and other friends who are in different places of their spiritual development.  Are you, like Trevor, influencing your friends for good? If not, what can you do to change?

"True friends influence those with whom they associate to “rise a little higher [and] be a little better.” You can help one another, particularly young men, prepare for and serve honorable missions. You can help one another remain morally clean. Your righteous influence and friendship can have an eternal effect not only on the lives of your associates but also on generations to come."
-Elaine S. Dalton, 2013

 

*Name has been changed

What Heaven Sees in You

I'm teaching the lesson in Young Womens' on Sunday. Topic is Temple Marriage. I made this video to show the girls. I hope you like it!

Music: What Heaven Sees in You; Mindy Gledhill

The Influence of the Holy Ghost

Usually I have a general topic in mind and some sort of plan for what I'll convey, if vague. But today, I'm wingin' it. I know that the Spirit will guide my words.


The Spirit. Yes. That is what I'll talk about.

The Holy Ghost has several names: The Spirit, Holy Spirit, Holy Ghost, Comforter, just to name a few.

Who is the Holy Ghost?
The Holy Ghost is the third member of the Godhead. He is a personage of spirit, without a body of flesh and bones. He is often referred to as the Spirit, the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of God, the Spirit of the Lord, or the Comforter.   -Holy Ghost, Study By Topic

What does He do?
The Spirit has many roles. He comforts us when we are weary. He answers our prayers. He testifies of truth when it is taught. It is through his witness that we can obtain a testimony of God the Father and Jesus Christ. He also can guide us. When we are about to make a decision, the Spirit can help us to feel which way is right. This can be a matter of choosing whether you will obey your parents, which class you should take with your two leftover credits, which college to go to, or any decision. The Holy Ghost can also protect us. He does this by warning us when we are about to make a wrong choice or if we are in danger.

How do I know if I am feeling/ have felt the Holy Ghost?
This is difficult to answer. Everybody feels the Spirit a bit differently. Most people describe hearing a "still small voice" or feeling a warmth. Some people cry when they are feeling the Spirit very strongly; they cry in a good, happy way. Sometimes you will feel at peace. Sometimes you will feel elated and jubilant. Other times you will just feel still and calm.
Often, it takes a lot of practice to figure out when your feeling the Spirit verses over-analyzing your own thoughts. Sometimes it's very obvious, sometimes it's not. You can strengthen your ability to realize the promptings and feelings of the Holy Ghost by praying for help and putting yourself in situations that are conducive to the Spirit.  Ponder the scriptures after you read them. Sit in a few moments of silence after praying so you can feel God answering your prayers through the  Spirit.

How can I feel the Spirit more in my life?
Start off by reading your scriptures, particularly the Book of Mormon, daily. Pray daily with real intent and a sincere heart. Do not place yourself in places or situations where wickedness and crudeness abound. Participate in wholesome activities. Keep the commandments. Take the sacrament and keep your covenants.

I know that the Holy Ghost is real. He most definitely is! I have felt his wonderful, powerful influence in my life. Many nights I have almost cried myself to sleep, but then I have been filled with stillness, peace, and joy by the Holy Ghost. He loves us, just like Heavenly Father loves us and Jesus loves us.

The Choice is Yours: A Guide to Decision Making

Making choices is one of the hardest things we have to do. It's so difficult, and often stressful. There are so many choices, and so many ways we can use our time. And it seems like there is so much pressure put on us to choose the right decisions. We face such a variety of choices everyday. There could be so many ways to categorize the choices we have to make, but I'm going to categorize our choices into three categories:

Unimportant Decisions

Life-Altering Decisions

Momentous Decisions

Unimportant decisions are the most common. What shoes you will wear, what font you choose to type your paper in, drinking juice or water with lunch..... you get the point. These choices either impact nothing at all, or have such a small ripple that nothing happens. In most cases, these decisions don't matter.

Life-Altering Decisions are just that: life-altering.  These include the college you go to, the career you pursue, choosing chastity, gaining a testimony, going to the temple regularly, etc. These are either one-time decisions like getting married, or many long term decisions like attending the temple. Life-Altering Decisions are planned for ahead of time and are focused on when decision making is discussed.

Momentous Decisions are the choices that people don't often think about. These include how you manage your time during a given day, your attitude for the day, or how you choose to dress that day. Notice how all of these choices are daily choices. Will you choose a modest outfit today? Will you read the scriptures? Momentous Decisions are vastly important, hence the name momentous. However, they are made in a second, and only seem to affect a moment. But, the ripple effect of momentous decisions reaches much farther than anyone could ever know. For example: If you choose not to exercise today, you know it will be harder to choose to workout tomorrow. Not only will it be harder, but you may feel more sluggish that day, be in a worse mood, etc. 

Lots of people overlook momentous decisions everyday. I know I do all the time. One of the hardest things we must learn to do in this life is to balance our time and choices. 

Elder Dallin H. Oaks, of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles gave a talk in a 2007 General Conference about making decisions. He focused on "Good, Better, Best". This talk is very helpful when trying to learn how to determine what decisions to make. He says:

"We should begin by recognizing the reality that just because something is good is not a sufficient reason for doing it. The number of good things we can do far exceeds the time available to accomplish them. Some things are better than good, and these are the things that should command priority attention in our lives."

 "As we consider various choices, we should remember that it is not enough that something is good. Other choices are better, and still others are best. Even though a particular choice is more costly, its far greater value may make it the best choice of all."

-Good, Better, Best, October 2007

I know that we will be blessed in our lives when we learn how to choose wisely when making all kinds of decisions. While there is sometimes, a lot of pressure, we also have many resources to help us. But most of all, I know that Heavenly Father will guide us when we make choices. And I know that no matter what we choose, He loves us.